Comment gold:

“First let me start this off with a description of who I am,
My name is Robert, I live in what used to be Tucsan Arizona, and after this story is done you will know why I say used to be.

I am 34 years old and work as a contractor. I’m a bit of a health nerd who works out seven times a week and eats only the top of the line protein shakes and other nastiness that is my lifes blood.
Im single, and after this I doubt any lady will ever come near me again.
Anyways one day in my normal everyday life I decide to peruse the internet and to a lesser extent Amazon.
My teeth were unfortunate enough to have a sweet tooth and nothing in my kitchen was anywhere near sugar-free yet sweet to the core, so I decided that I may as well search for something that might satisfy me in times like this.
Then the miracle that is Haribo came upon my search window. The price for a 5 pound bag was nothing but a steal, so my finger decided to hover over the purchase button, and for a moment my finger just stood there a ominous sign for the things to come. And with over zealous enthusiasum i pressed the order button and thus my death was secure.” Continue Reading…